Alright…so we’ve all done it.  You know- that little thing you didn’t listen to while training.  That little “ow”.  That little “ow” that becomes a “tweek”…..

That’s what I did on Tuesday at Masters Swimming.  I was running late and didn’t get there in time to warm up (packing my food for the day).  I started right off with the one arm drills the coach was prescribing.  Almost immediately my right shoulder started “popping” a bit…but I continued on with the 25 meters of drill…and then for fun- did it one more time. 

Nothing hurt  much during the workout but then later I could feel I had done something to my shoulder.  And this happens to be the same shoulder I had surgery on to cut the upper bicep tendon three years ago….

Now here’s where the tweekin comes in….Not only did I “tweek” my shoulder- but I full on start tweekin in my head!  I start thinking, “Oh no!  I’m going to need surgery!  I’m not going to be able to swim again!  I’m not going to be able to do my Ironman”.  Blah, blah, blah, blah.  The list goes on and on!

The first thing I did do though was to call Dr Ken at Active Care  and make an appointment to see him that day.  Dr Ken first put my shoulder back in the correct spot, then had me come back a few days later for some more care.  His prognosis- I pinched my rotator cuff and should keep using my shoulder, but warm up good! 

Today I went back to Masters and took my time with a few hundreds to warm up.  Our workout today was longer sets 125s and such.  I could feel my shoulder a bit during the workout, but nothing that felt like a “tweek”.  Afterwards I was a bit sore- iced it for awhile- and called Dr Ken to confirm that all would be ok  (he said my shoulder was going to be fine).

Tweekin is no fun.  It’s no fun to do and no fun to let run wild in my mind.  One thing I did learn from this is to always properly warm up!  I know this is important for everyone- but now that I’ll officially be over 50 in a few days, I really need to pay attention to my warm ups!  It’s just not worth loosing energy and training time over….So here’s to those darn warm ups and making  the extra time they take.

I'm goin in!

Where'd It Go

On tap for Saturday was a run from the Conoco Station, over Dinosaur Ridge, into Red Rocks and up to the Amphitheater for the Boot Camp that goes on there, and then run back through the town of Morrison to the car. 

I had two friends who were going to join me.  One called the night before to cancel (problems with her knee).  Ok…no problem, I still have one person to suffer with me…..

Well Saturday morning rolls around and my alarm clock goes off at 6 am and all I want to do is stay in bed.  I’m sleepy and don’t want to get out from under the warm covers.  But I do, and make some tea, eat some breakfast and call my friend to check in. 

Yeap, we’re still on track to meet at 8:15.  Only thing is I’m already not “feelin” the mojo to do my workout as it’s written.  But then….I start to feel guilty about wanting to changing it!  I mull this around in  my head a bit.  A few minutes later I get a phone call…my friend can’t make it because her dog just had a seizure.  No problem, I totally understand!

Where'd My Mojo Go?

 But then, I’m left with a dilemma.  I absolutely don’t want to workout!  I don’t want to leave the house.  I don’t want to run.  I don’t want to go to the friggin Boot Camp at Red Rocks.  So….Where’d my Mojo Go???? 

I have to admit this was tough.  To get myself out the door was a struggle.  I told myself I would go to Green Mountain and run the trails there.  OK- I was feeling a bit more motivated for that.  This was enough to get me into my car and driving to Green Mountain.  As I passed Green Mountain (which happens to be on the way to the Conoco Station) I saw that the trails were covered in snow……guess it was going to be the Conoco Station!!

I made it to the station, got my stuff out and ready, (still not feelin’ it) and right before I started running I got a call from my friend saying she was still going to join me!  What sweet music to my ears!!!!  I began an out and back run and 30 minutes later I was back at the car and we were off together headed into the hills of Red Rocks. 

 We made it up to the Amphitheater and found out the class was canceled due to the snow.  We did an obligatory lap on the icy stairs and headed back down to the car.  We had a good time, worked the hills hard and enjoyed the downhill back to town.

Now here’s the thing I was contemplating.  It’s hard to stay motivated and keep my “mojo” sometimes when I’m training by myself.   Just knowing I’m  going to meet someone helps get me out the door, even if I’m a bit tired.  Saturday- I didn’t have that someone, and it was tough!  It can be downright tough sometimes to WANT to go train! 

I know when training for an Ironman, EVERY workout counts!  I can’t afford to cut them short or blow them off.  It WILL make a difference 6 months from now when I’m cranking out a 140.6 miles. Thinking this is one way that gets me out the door.  Another way that helps is to just start.  Just start running, biking or swimming for 10 minutes or whatever- and somehow it’s ok…..Telling myself I was going to run at Green Mountain really helped get me out the door Saturday.  Not that I was psyched about it…but it helped. 

Making plans with friends is the best way to make sure I show up for a workout…but when that falls through…and the MOJO is just plain gone…..it’s good to try and come up with ways to get out the door anyway.  Caz even if I can’t find it before I leave the house, chances are high that I will find it once I’ve started!!!!!!

There It Is!

Supa- Star

Do you ever have those training days or day when you get done and you just feel solid?  Like you could kick some serious a$$ and you are going to rock your next race?  You know….That you ARE a  SUPER STAR!  ?????

Well that’s the way I felt today when I walked out of the Rec Center, wet hair and all, in 20 degree weather after another kick butt Masters swim workout.  And here’s why…

After the past month, of getting my workouts in, grieving the loss of my father, and getting back to Denver and my life here….I have entered back into the realm of some serious training.

In 24 hours I swam Masters; did a grueling power Computrainer Class that seriously had me close to puking; slept 6.5 hours and then back at Masters this morning getting my arms blown up again!

At the beginning of each workout I felt  a bit flat for 10 minutes or so, but once I warmed up I was hammering hard.  It felt GREAT (even though I would wonder sometimes if I could keep going).  I imagined myself holding the pace for an entire race and finding that edge to dance on without blowing myself up.  You see, this race season is about racing “gutsy“, not just “safe” anymore.  I’ve been afraid (OMG I said it out loud!),  yeap afraid to HURT.So I’m going there- you know “there”- the “there” of pain and not knowing if you can hang on…..I want to dance that line and see what it might hold.

So after three hard workouts in 24 hours that had me working HARD and dancing with that line…I walked out of Masters this morning feeling like a SUPER STAR!  Like a real athlete who could do some damage this racing season.

Yesterday I escaped the 4 feet of snow and headed out of Mt Shasta to Redding with my friend Craig for a 4 hour run.

We drove over the pass to I-5 and drove south from snow to rain for a lovely day of running along the Sacramento River.

By the time we got to the trailhead it was close to 11:00 with a heavy drizzle (not quite a rain). I put on my Newton Motion All Weather Shoes, we bundled up and headed out for two out and back trips.

The day was a bit gloomy and wet but being out in nature was a welcomed relief from a week of being indoors.

This trail is spectacular as you run along the Sacramento River the whole time. With all the rainfall in the past week there where waterfalls cascading into the river and swollen creeks dumping gallons of water to merge with the current. Ducks and other waterfowl dotted the water and river banks adding to the serenity of the run.

Sacramento River Rail Trail- minus the rain

The joy of running in this type of weather is not many people will brave the conditions to be outside. During the course of 4 hours I met a family fishing; two people walking their dogs; one person on a mt bike…but no other runners!

I found so much peace and serenity with this run. I was able to think about my Dad; pray to God; listen; and just feel. One thing my Dad instilled in me was a deep appreciation and love for the outdoors. The outdoors is my church and where I practice my spirituality. Outdoors is where I commune with God and where I am in awe of the beauty that is all around me.

So yesterday was a perfect day for me. As I spent 4 hours running I also spent time singing, just out of the shear joy of being alive and in such a beautiful setting on such a perfect day.

One thing I realized on my run, is that my Dad is no longer in a house in McCloud- but that now he can be with me where ever I am. I don’t have to call him up to talk to him- I can talk to him anytime, anywhere! He is no longer confined to a body… And something else I realized is if I’m real quiet…I can hear Dad answer!

And with all that- I think I’ll just keep Running and Singing in the Rain.

Have You Ever…. ridden 100 miles on your bike trainer?  Have you?  OMG….Well- I think it’s one of the toughest things I’ve ever done to date! 

Someone (Coach Andrea) decided I should ride 100 miles on my bike this particular Tuesday as it was on my training program.  Unfortunately- the guy upstairs didn’t get the memo and the heavens opened up and rained ALL day non-stop! 

I had been following the weather forecast for a few days and was anticipating the rain, while secretly hoping that 100% chance of rain might turn into 10%.  Definitely NOT the case though.  Luckily I had prepared for this, by heading to the nearest video store and renting 4 movies……..yeap- 4 movies!  I wanted to make sure I didn’t run out of mind-numbing entertainment. 

Next I set up my bike in the bedroom I was staying in at my parents.  There’s a small TV in there with a DVD player and a great view of the forest (bonus).  I put a few fans in the room- lowered the TV, lined up the bike and voila- I had the second part of my preparation done.

The 100 Mile Bedroom Setup

My last step was to get all my nutrition ready.  I wanted to make sure I didn’t have a reason to meander into the kitchen- ya know, check to see if the dishes needed to be done or something. My goal was to stay on that bike the whole 100 miles except for bathroom breaks and I could only take one no more than every hour…….

Ok.    Movies-check;  Bike-check; Nutrition and Hydration- Check…it’s 9 am and I’m ready to roll (so to speak), and off I went…

First up was The Soloist.  If you have not seen that movie I can not recommend it enough.  My profession is a Mental Health Therapist and found the film did an amazing job truly depicting what it is like for people with severe and persistent mental illness.  I loved the movie and it was completely entertaining and got me through the first two hours of my ride effortlessly.

Next up was the Curious Case of Benjamin Button.  This one was pretty good, but it didn’t grab me like The Soloist.  That movie is bloody long!  I think it was close to 3 hours. I mean that was good in one way but even on the bike I was kinda like- Dude, when is this going to end?  Pretty cool idea- getting younger as you get older.  Actually as I’m writing this, sometimes I feel younger now than I did in my twenties.  I know I’m fitter now! 

Alright.  Here I was 5 hours into my ride with a sore bumm and two movies left to watch.  Next I tried some other movie that I don’t remember the name of and ditched it quickly.  I was down to my last movie which was one of the Jennifer Aniston movies.  It was ok….cute…..and at least kept my mind pleasantly numb for the last 1.5 hours!

What can I say about riding 100 miles on your trainer?????  It kinda sucks- but the cool part was I looked at this as mental training for Ironman Cozumel (IMCZ).  If  I could endure 6.5 hours on my bloody trainer I could endure 112 miles riding on the Island of Cozumel!  If I could keep it together mentally sitting in the same spot, watching movies, I could certainly withstand whatever IMCZ might throw my way. 

I think this training day was more of a mental training day than a physical training day.  It was my mind over matter that got me through this day……

Oh- and did I mention???  The following day (yeap it was still raining) I got to ride 50 miles on that trainer and then run 12 miles on the treadmill.  What a brick that was 

The moral is- just do it- even if it means indoors, because there is more to train than just our bodies…..

I’ve been contemplating pain lately.

There are basically two types of pain.  Physical and Emotional Pain.

Let’s start with physical pain……

First I was thinking about the pain when I train and race.  I read an article in Triathlon Mag about being able to tolerate pain when racing.  It made me realize that I don’t do that and that’s why I don’t “go for blood“.  I have not made myself really uncomfortable when racing and I wonder what the result would be if I did??? I probably wouldn’t miss 3rd place by 12 seconds…hummmmm…..

This thought brought me to another physical pain…as when there is something wrong and ignoring that pain.  I think of my Dad who had severe pain in his neck for one year and all that time it was cancer growing…and then I thought of my dear friend Jeffery who complained of chest pains the day before he had a heart attack that took his life……you get the picture…the kind of pain that we should pay attention to but don’t.  As opposed to the pain of training and racing…..hummmmmm

Pain is there for a reason.  It’s our bodies way of telling us something is not right….it’s just that we have to learn which pain to pay attention to and which to ignore…..I think I may pay too much attention to racing pain when I would be better served ignoring it……but I am grateful for the times I’ve payed attention to pain that was due to an illness or serious injury….hummmmmmm

Now emotional pain….man am I getting my share of that now.  Whatching my father go through treatment for cancer…not being able to talk, hear, eat….it is very hard and painful emotionally.  This man who was larger than life and could always fix everything, is now dependent on us to do everything for him.  It’s painful to watch him when he struggles- with his physical and emotional pain.  It’s painful  to watch those who love him stuggle with their emotional pain. 

It was scary for awhile…as in would he survive 8 weeks of chemo and radiation….today I can say that I am very hopeful he will survive!!!!

Which pain is easier I wonder?  Usually with physical pain there is a fix for that…kinda like putting a bandaide on a booboo….but emotional pain, how do you fix that????  The best I know to do for now is to remain hopeful and positive.  This helps the emotional pain for me…and for my dad when he is struggling.   We are given many gifts…and even though those gifts may downright SUCK in the moment….in hindsight we can see the gift that came from the pain……..

And who knows…if I can learn to endure the emotional pain maybe that can translate to accepting the physical pain later……….hummmmmmm

The other day I did yet another 100 mile bike ride.  I am not complaining mind you…..It’s just I have this nagging question….

WHY DOES A HEAD WIND NEVER BECOME A TAIL WIND?????

I thought at first it was just a Colorado thing…you know the old “if you don’t like the weather wait 10 minutes” kinda thing. 

But then I got out here to California and the same dang thing keeps happening.  That darn head wind just doesn’t become a tail wind……

Every time I get out to ride and there is a headwind  I never curse it…I actually am always grateful to be riding in windy conditions because I’m pretty sure Ironman Cozumel (IMCZ) will be pretty windy on the bike.  I know that the more I train in the wind the less the wind will bug me come race day….theoretically speaking that is.

I have learned to embrace the wind.  The wind is my friend and I actually don’t mind it one bit……again- good training for IMCZ- but dagnabit if I never get the pleasure of a rockin tail wind….but I guess that’s part of the training too….Do you think Cozumel might have Tail Winds????

Hummmm—until next time—–”The answer my friend, is blowin in the wind, The answer is blowing in the wind…..”

The other day my workout was to head to the near by high school track and run 8×1 mile repeats….I was ready and felt psyched to do them.

I got to the track around 11:00 am and the temps where already near 90 degrees.  I ran my obligatory 2 miles warm up (ok…really just 1 mile that day) and then began my first 1 mile repeat.  By the time I made the fourth lap of the mile I was dying!  I felt flat and was breathing hard.  I looked at my watch and my time was one minute slower than what my coach wanted me to do…..Oh, Oh…this was going to be a struggle….

I walked my recovery and got to the line and began my next mile repeat….I know sometimes I can take a few miles to warm up so I was hopeful things might turn around…..Nope, not a chance….Basically- that’s how it went the whole 8x 1 mile repeats….

After about the third repeat I wanted to quit.  I wanted to stop and walk- I wanted to only do 3 or 4 repeats- I wanted to be anywhere but on this hot track….

That’s when I thought about my Dad.  My Dad will be beginning radiation and chemo treatment in the next few weeks for the cancer they found in his neck……I thought how my Dad is not going to be able to give up….how he is not going to be able to just do “some” of his treatment or cut it short, how he is going to have to stick it out and not give up.

That is when I made the decision that I would honor my Dad by doing the same.  That I would not miss a workout; that I would not cut a workout short; that I would stick it out and not give up.  I even decided that I would do every workout just a little bit longer than I was suppose to- even if that was by a few seconds.

In the two weeks I’ve been here in Mt Shasta with my Dad I have felt kinda down and have been cutting my workouts short.  Riding 1 hr 45 mins rather than 2 hrs; running 8 miles instead of 10….you get the picture. 

 But that will not be the case any longer.  I will draw inspiration from my Dad as he fights cancer and I am committed to completing all workouts in full and not missing a single workout.  I will not give up or cut anything short……I’m in this for the long haul and 3 more months of prep for Ironman…and my Dad is in this for his life…..He inspires me daily and I’ll fight my own battle right along side him!

So that was revelation number One…..(there were a few revelations that day on the bloody hot track).  Lately I have been not liking my body as I feel that I have a lot of fat on my legs and body and can’t understand why I have not gotten “ripped” and looking like all these other lean athletes!  I look down at my legs and think “legs, you suck, look at that fat above your knees and how my thighs are bigger and my pants fit a bit tighter”…..

Well the revelation was- WTF!  Why am I saying that to my body and legs for!?????  This body and legs are doing amazing things for me and I should be Thanking my body- not hating it!!!!  So right at that moment I started thanking my legs for getting me through this track workout and for helping me run 30 miles or biking 100s of miles…. I thank my body for being healthy and carrying me on my journey to Ironman Cozumel….

I have found a new perception and like for my body (to be honest I’m working on the Love part).  I appreciate everything my body does for me and not longer feel like it’s betrayed me.  I still do wish at times I had that ripped/lean body- maybe that will come someday- but if itdoesn’t I’m ok w/ how my body currently is and I am grateful everyday for the miles these legs and lungs carry me!

Who knew that one day at track could have such a profound impact in my thinking and view on myself and life.  It’s amazing where and when we get the opportunity to gain insight about ourselves.  I’m glad I made it to the track that day exactly when I did…

Oh and BTW- my times kept getting longer and I never did have a great session that day (time wise that is)- but I did gain much more mentally than physically….I got all 8 repeats done- and I didn’t give up!